Love, Sierra Leone and Tipper Trucks: September 2011

Not until I gave birth to Thea did I understand the love one could feel towards their offspring. Often I had wondered at my mother's determined love of me despite my treacherous teenage behaviour, and both my mum and dad's support of me no matter what. Nothing could have prepared me though for the intense love that I feel for her.

I cannot express therefore, how blessed I feel that Winston and I have the privilege to parent Thea in the way we can. Should Winston and I have chosen to remain in London to begin our family both of us would have had to work, we would most likely, not have the financial option for either one of us to stay at home with our children.

Thea and her cousin Pious

When someone gives birth here, planned, or unplanned, it is a joyous occasion. Women with young children (or KOMBRA in Krio - please do not rely on my spelling, I have written it as it is said) are celebrated, thanked, protected and guarded, guided and helped. Many a time I have been thanked for caring for Thea by a complete stranger, this gives you a sense of pride and responsibility in what you are doing as a mother. Help has often been offered to comfort a screaming Thea on a flight to Freetown. This is a stark contrast to the distasteful looks you get in England in the same scenario. An incident comes to mind in which a young woman told my friend that her breastfeeding her 3 month old daughter in MacDonald s was disgusting! Attitudes towards motherhood are very different in Sierra Leone.

Attitudes towards children are very different too.

Generally, children in Sierra Leone have a lot set against them. The infant mortality rate is still high (78.38 deaths / 1000 live births -for comparisson in the UK it is 4.62 deaths / 1000 live births) (The World Factbook 2011 jDictionary Mobile) as it is anywhere that poverty and bacteria reign. Once they have overcome the small matter of staying alive, for most their childhood is relatively very short, most children do not have toys to play with, a lot do not get the privilege of attending school and many will be working to supplement the family income by the age of 5 or 6.

I heard on the BBC World Service a discussion about human rights and whether there are any internationally shared ideas of a 'human right.' One thing that al of the experts on this programme agreed was that where ever in the world you go people strongly feel that all children have the right not to have to work and to get an education.

It must be excruciating to deny your child or children this 'basic human right' because you need them to work in order to sustain your family. Or to have to choose which of your children you send to school because you cannot afford to send each of them. I have seen families walking on the highway back from a day at the farm all carrying 'size appropriate' bundles of wood or cassava leaves, it looks more like a team effort to me than the image of child labour I used to have in my mind.

Young boys hang around rivers and quarry's offering to help move sand or stones in between their play to get some change to buy extra food or to take home. Often too, you will see small children moving around neighbourhoods selling wood or plastic bags of cold drinking water to supplement the family income.

It would be easy to consign these children to the image we have fed to us by all the big charities but I think that is to ignore how amazing humans really are, especially children. They do smile, they do enjoy themselves and they are very resourceful!

One day Winston and I were walking home and a young girl of 9 or 10 years was looking on the ground around her crying, I mean really wailing. We asked her what had happened to which she replied that she had dropped 2000 Leones (about 27p) that she was supposed to take to market. Of course, we gave her 2000 Leones to take home so that she wouldn't get reprimanded. The very next day I heard a familiar sounding wail outside our compound, the same little girl was doing the exact same thing. I don't know if she knew where we lived or it was just a coincidence but I had to smile at her acting ability. I suppose you have to use what you've got to get what you want. Several children have tried this trick on me since and I have to say that I still get sucked in, after all, you never know.